Natalia Arson Voider

In my real day to day life, I do the most in every situation. I'm not silent about my thoughts or feelings. I'm not opposed to standing up for myself just because I'm "by" myself. I believe in cussing, expression, racism, sexism, agism, fuck boys and type basic becky bitches with the good hair. And I love my Dad. I'm impatient. I'm irrational. I'm bitchy. I'm queen bitch. If I like your style, you'll know. I block niggas. I'm petty, immature, childish, dumb, I know. I elicit strong emotions in people. I meet people. I open up my big mouth and I say something extremely unusual or controversial and then expect people to move on and get over it as fast as I do. I know people. Some people. I understand people. I look people in the eye. I have nothing to hide. I think about people. I do not accept apologies nor do I believe in forgiveness. People are always their authentic and organic selves with me as I am with them. You have bullied me, obsessed over me, threatened me, harassed me, assaulted me and assassinated my character. I refer to you as "idiot," I judge you, cry over you, laugh at you, question you, I really do because you're a fascinating creature, hesitant of trying something new. You're unstimulated by the truth. You're unmoved. You're unfaithful. You don't want to talk to me. You don't want to talk. You want to fight. You want any reason to fight. You want to deny, erase, and confine me. I'm crazy. I accept me. I love me. I love a stylish gentleman who dominates the relationship because I allow it. I love class. I love the opposite of ratchet. I'm not your wife, though. I'm not your anything, though. You can't have me, half me or whole me. Goodbye. I don't mind leaving. I don't mind moving on. I don't mind you. I don't wait for, on, or by you. I changed my number. It's 2017. I'm disobedient or brainwashed. I can't stand your entitlement. And shit. And bullshit. And drama. And fuckshit, gang shit, rap shit, hood shit, cute shit. I'm amazing, nervous, inquisitive, understanding, kind, strong, personal, controversial, sensitive, genuine, dramatic, silly. I'm regular, plain ol', boring ol', lame ol', good ol' having ass bitch and I'm graceful in my grow up, glow up, bitch. And I'm happy, bitch. I'm excited, I'm missed, appreciated, swept off my feet, in love, bitch. I get nervous when I don't like it, I get nervous when I do like it. I get nervous a lot. I'm really in tune with my nervous system. I still don't like wearing my natural hair. I know me. I know what I like, I know what I need, I know what I'm feeling and I know what my favorite color is. And, I get butterflies that nobody ever knows about. We're not on the same page. You're the one I'll never have and I'm the one who got away.

— Talia

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